When I received Anita's blog and read the title I thought "Ah-ha, here's a woman who knows how to catch our attention." But I didn't read the post, but instead decided to prolong my curiosity so I could learn how to pep things up along with everyone else, lol! ; )
We're all ears, Anita!
Adding Fun to Your Sex Life
The process of making love in the same old way can get boring. Admit it and your half way there to curing the problem. Finding time, opportunity, and energy might also add to the problem. After all, who can make a grand production every time you want to jump between the sheets?
The single most important way to alleviate the problem is communication. Man or woman, sometimes the people that we love don’t see the things the same way we do. If you can talk about what you want or what you’d like to try, then you can get feedback and develop a plan to make it better for both of you.
“Our sex life is boring”
“How can we change it?”
Don’t let this be the end of conversation.
Now in every article about the subject, most experts say to try different positions. Okay, it changes things up but it doesn’t necessarily add some fun, not unless you are a contortionist. Change for change sake might help for a little while but it won’t increase the fun factor.
“So what will?”
“A change in attitude.”
“Oh, no, the awful statement about changing my attitude. Look, I’m tired, busy with my kids and my job. I don’t have time to play at sex. I want to get in, get out and go to sleep.”
“Fair enough and I can relate, but I never said this would be easy. Having fun is hard work, just look at every sport out there.”
Let’s first look at a way to find ideas that will increase the fun factor.
- Watch love scenes or romantic comedies, what is happening in those scenes that you wish you could try. Develop it in your relationship. (A love scene in the park – try your back yard or deck.) New places can always add a thrill to the mix.
- Talk about it – the more you think or talk about sex the more you begin to see the potential of enjoying yourself.
- Be adventurous – buy sexy underwear, go commando, visit an adult toy store, do things that open your mind to new ideas. No one says you have to try them but at least let your mind toy with the idea.
- Read erotica – find a scene in a book that you think might be fun to try, have your lover read it.
Example is my latest release “Texas Passion”
“Well, now, did you think I’d ever arrive?” He shut the door and tossed his hat onto the table by the door. Dark curly hair circled his head, and his dark brown eyes met hers.
“I had no doubt you’d get here eventually.” Her hands shaking, Catherine laid her book on the rocker and tried for a more seductive tone. “But I’d like to know what delayed you.”
One corner of his mouth turned up in a crooked grin, he stepped forward, and then paused. “Wait a second, don’t I know you?”
Catherine nodded and toyed with the knot holding her robe together. Should she shed her robe and try to seduce him first? Or just tell him her name?
He tilted his head slightly, and a frown formed on his lips. The subdued lighting of the lantern didn’t mask the lines marring his brow.
Apprehension slithered over her skin, and a lump the size of Texas grew in her throat. “I…uh…”
More of an accusation than a question, her name echoed in her head. “Yes, I…” She edged closer.
He shuffled backward until his back hit the door. “What the hell are you doing here?” His gaze dropped to swell of her breasts, and the cattywhumped expression on his face registered. Clarity filled her head. The man might deny it, but the heat in his eyes proved he found her appealing. Energy pulsed through her, and she untied the knot at her waist. “I decided, since we’re practically engaged, I didn’t want you sleeping with another woman.”
“Whoa, don’t even think about removing that robe.” He held out his hands to stop her, but his tongue slid over his parched lips and the blaze in his eyes sparked higher. Catherine’s confidence grew, and the doubt that had plagued her for the last few hours faded. He might resist, but she’d show him this was what they both wanted.
Now all you need is a cowboy hat and bustier and relive the scene with your lover.
If not, maybe one of the other suggestions will provide you with a way to increase the element of fun in your sex life. Then you can discover the joy of playing with your partner both in and out of bed.
Buy link for “Texas Passion”
Hmm...great advice, Anita. Now where is Mr. Leigh hiding...??? ; )